Don’t ask me why I did this, because my answer involves the long and meandering evolution of a series of familial in-jokes and comedy bits that I don’t quite understand myself. But please understand that when my wife and I had this idea a year ago it made perfect sense to us, even though right now, I’m not entirely sure how we we got here.
And where is “here?”
Well, for the last month I have spent large sections of my free time making my brother in law a Chadvent Colander.
A Chadvent Colander is like an advent calendar in that every day you open a little envelope but instead of a little chocolate or Lego toy or whatnot, inside there is a different Chad. Also, they are all affixed to a colander. Because puns.
I made 24 different cards in the style of a Top Trumps card, each for a different Chad. Chad Kroeger, Chad Smith, Chadwick Boseman, lake Chad, the country Chad…all are represented here with facts, stats, and (mostly) nonsense.
Above: Chads the country and Kroeger
Above: various Chads
Above: The finished Chadvent Colander, in all its glory.
Now that the project is complete, I can say that it is very difficult to find 24 different Chads and riff on them in bitesize humorous ways. The Wikipedia listing of pages beginning with “Chad” was very helpful, but when the majority of Chads are American sportspeople you’ve never heard of, it can be quite daunting.
We gave my brother in law the Chadvent Colander on Saturday, and he was overjoyed. I can’t wait to see what his reaction is to all the chads.
My wife is away so I decided to go crazy and get my teeth cleaned, have the car detailed, get an oil change, buy groceries, wash the dishes, clean the floor, do a couple of loads of laundry, have a workout, and now I’m going to finish it all up with a nice salad.
Most people outside my family don’t know this, but my mother has been living with Alzheimer’s for close to 10 years. Over the holidays, she finally went into long-term care.
My dad told his story about being her caregiver to my hometown paper. He felt it was important to share this, to help other caregivers and their families know they’re not alone. And I am my father’s daughter. And my mother’s too.
My wife wrote a short thread about what her family has been living with for almost ten years and the changes that have recently taken place. And I love her.
Somewhere around 10 years ago I Photoshopped this cat with a Batman cowl. My ex just sent me this picture. Apparently someone painted it with all of these other cats and made it into a puzzle of… Cats of the World? Like where is Batcat from? Transylvania?
As is my custom, I have drawn my lovely wife a picture for her birthday. Every year, I draw them, frame them, give them to her, and then she bugs me until I finally get around to hanging it in our bedroom (usually sometime in mid-to-late summer).
I have been doing this for eight years now. And we’re running out of room.
So I had to get creative. Which led me to draw a triptych, designed to be hung one over the other on a skinny wall next to the door.
It represents the pecking order of our little family. And every single day, I’m happier than ever before that I get to be low man on the totem pole in my wife’s little kingdom.
